The History Lesson
This week back in 1880, Ned Kelly was captured. One of Australia’s most important pieces of literature was written by an uneducated criminal. His name was Ned Kelly, and he started out a good kid. In fact, at age eight, he risked his life to save another kid from drowning. But he was the son of a poor Irish Catholic widower — not a high station in 19th-century Australia. Soon he’d launched a career — as a bank robber.
A really likeable bank robber. One time his gang rode into town — took hostages — and treated ‘em to free drinks while Ned robbed the savings and loan. Then he thanked the locals by burning their mortgage records. Stunts like that made Ned a working-class hero. But along the way, the gang shot three cops. Which also made him a murderer. In 1878 he was officially named an outlaw – which meant anyone in the country could legally shoot him on sight.
Kelly took offense at that. So in the town of Jerilderie, he dictated a 56-page manifesto. It took two months. He detailed his family’s persecution by corrupt police. He demanded land be shared with the poor. And he threatened vengeance on anyone who disagreed. Kelly didn’t live to see his manifesto published: In 1880, he was captured in a shootout with the police. And even though 8,000 people rallied in Melbourne demanding his release, he was hung. The Jerilderie letter didn’t resurface.
The Kelvin Car Bomb
As crowned by Hans Gerner, owner of The Kelvin Arms in Houston, TX.
In a pint glass pour:
– 1/2 pint Belhaven Scottish Ale
In a separate shot glass, combine:
– 1 oz. Scotch
– 1 oz. Drambuie
Drop the shot glass in the pint glass, chug, get stoned.